Have You Reached Your Upper Limit? Here’s What To Do About It

I love, love, love to read. If you’ve perused my website for more than five minutes, you’ve probably already noticed a few book recommendations tucked away here and there. One I could read over and over again (and have!) is The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks, which thoroughly explains the upper limit problem and how to overcome it. The basic gist is that we all have a limit to how much love, abundance, success, creativity, joy, etc. we are able to experience comfortably.

Maybe these situations sound familiar. You go on a romantic weekend getaway with your partner only to come home and pick an enormous fight. Or you finished your last college class and then totaled your car on the way to a celebratory dinner. That one actually happened to me!

These situations may seem coincidental, but if you’re tuned into your upper limits, you’ll notice the pattern that emerges. Something expands (your wealth, client roster, confidence) and then something brings you back down a peg (a hateful comment on your last IG post, perhaps?). This pattern can often show up as self-sabotage, too.

But the good news is you CAN break out of this vicious cycle! 

Upper limits are largely tied to self worth. And as your in-house confidence coach, I have a couple tricks up my sleeve to support you with both.


A technique that can help raise your upper limits and skyrocket your confidence is adopting an affirmation practice. Affirmations should be stated in the present, as if already in existence, and recited several times out loud each day. Here are a few examples to get you started:

  • I have plenty of time to do what matters.
  • Money is in abundance and always readily available to me.
  • My upper limit and self worth are expanding daily.

Have a brainstorm session and see what affirmations you can come up with for yourself! If you feel stuck in a particular area of your life, start there.

Love Yourself List

It’s far too easy to get down on ourselves when we aren’t reaching our goals or feel like we’ve hit a cap on our growth. But I’ll tell you what. You are wonderful, talented, worthy, and perfect – just as you are, in this moment. One of the best things you can do to break through your self-imposed barriers is to celebrate YOU.

What are all of the qualities and gifts that make you a fabulous partner, mom, business owner, friend, sister, neighbor, and so on? Maybe you can whip up the most delicious raw brownies, have completed a marathon, are the one everyone else can count on, kicked butt on your last sales presentation, or write frequent love notes to your spouse on the bathroom mirror. Perhaps you have a contagious laugh, a smile that lights up the room, or are a great listener. (That’s so rare these days!)

I want you to start a list of traits you love about yourself. Aim for at least 50 to start. Yes, that’s fifty with a zero on the end. If you get stuck, ask a friend or family member to share what they like best about you. Make sure you don’t stop until you’ve uncovered at least 50 epic, mundane, and all the reasons in between to honor your awesomeness.

If you’re going through an especially low period in your life, rest assured I’ve been there, too. Sometimes it’s hard to see any goodness in ourselves. But remember that God created you in His image, with unique gifts to share. So if the first and only thing on your celebration list right now is “I am fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14), that’s a pretty amazing and honest place to start. 😉

Lemons To Lemonade

We can spin any story into a heroic tale or a misfortunate fable. That’s the power of the human mind and a creative imagination. The media does this all the time. And so do you and I. When a few days go by without hearing from a close friend, we might make up they’re angry with us. They might be thinking the same about you. If someone cuts us off on the highway, we get angry about how inconsiderate people are these days. When they might actually be rushing to meet a loved one at the hospital. The stories go on and on.

And we’ve all turned lemons into lemonade as well. We can just as easily seek the good, celebrate love, and uncover benefits from even the darkest of times. Perhaps running out of gas spared you from an accident up ahead. That friend who hasn’t reached out might be planning your surprise party and afraid of spilling the beans. Or maybe she’s going through a tough time and this is an opportunity for you to step up and be there for her at a deeper level.

Making it your mission to find positivity and mining lessons from your mistakes or hardships will work to expand your ability to receive all the good things that are waiting to come your way.


Sometimes all you need to turn things around is an attitude of gratitude. Rather than beating yourself up for self-sabotaging or deciding your past accomplishments were all a fluke, take time daily to reflect on what you’re grateful for instead. Look at how far you’ve come and give thanks for the journey. Celebrate the little wins. They’ll only get bigger. Practice gratitude for every wonderful thing that shows up in your life and watch as your abundance continues to multiply.

If you’re ready to start shattering through the glass ceilings in your life, these 4 mindset practices will absolutely help you bust through.

I’d love to hear which one was the biggest ah-ha or reminder for you today: reciting affirmations, making a love yourself list, turning lemons into lemonade, or embracing a gratitude practice. Tell me in the comments and I will be there to cheer you on!

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